We start our chemo treatment tomorrow (Thursday the 24th). We arrive at 8:45 for labs, 9:00 for another chemo teach and around 10 I will start my infusion. They said to expect to be there all day because they will start this slowly and monitor how I handle everything. Future visits should be shorter.
My heart is at peace. It is amazing really. Two weeks ago I think I would have been having a panic attack. Today I am at peace. I am grateful for the time we’ve had, time to process, learn more, focus on nutrition and strengthening my body. We’ve seen a huge difference in these last few weeks, amazingly I am feeling better. I have been tired but not crashing as I typically would.
James has shared this vision he has of me in a boxing ring with cancer. He has seen this time before treatment as a training time and I have been circling the ring saying, “Not yet, not yet. But just you wait until I’m ready.” We’re gonna take you out! I feel ready.
God has been at work within me on some emotional heart issues. Over and over this topic has come up from various sources. He has been drawing things out that have been stagnating inside and bringing healing and peace. I am so grateful.
My neighbor has prayed, ‘May Abba’s peace chase you down and overtake you!”. I know several others have been praying similar prayers. I like that analogy that brings to mind, being overtaken by peace! I would have to say it is happening! Old habits are hard to break and I have found myself trying to think of something to fret about only to have the thought dissipate. Bad thoughts are not sticking. It is like there is not anything for them to root in. I love it. I have not done anything to earn this peace. But freely it has been given, this peace that surpasses all understanding.
Did I tell you that I was grateful? I am. I am grateful for so many things, too much to name all here.
We cherish your prayers as we go forward. My prayer is that God will reach down and grab hold of your heart in a new way as you walk with us. If you are walking this with us that he will minister to your heart and show you his love for you, too.
Gratefully,
Sarah
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